Because Homeschooling is NOT a Living Hell

Lest I leave you all thinking my life resembles the 5th ring of Dante’s Inferno, I now present you with a brief synopsis of our second day of homeschooling.

Our schoolroom the night before the first day.

I don’t think we need to rehash yesterday.

Black frowny faces with tears courtesy of Addie.

Now, day two.

By 8 a.m. this morning all the kids decided to start their work early while still clad in their pajamas. This was not my idea, in fact I kept ignoring their requests for help. I  explained, through gulps of my coffee, that while they chose to begin school at that hour, I most certainly did not.

So while the first day of school did not go as well as I envisioned, it obviously was not so wretched as to sour them on schooling altogether. As far as I’m concerned, that makes Monday one for the win column!

By four o’clock on day two.

Things got a little messy (I’m still questioning my own judgement on the use of a sensory rice bin) but no more than usual and thankfully, despite more rain, the kitchen stayed dry due to all of Tony’s hard work yesterday.

Throughout the course of the day, nothing extraordinary transpired. And wonder of wonders, Teddy didn’t scream during history! He only sang his version of Bob the Builder while I read, still pausing at all the right moments. (Baaaaaaaaa! Go, go, go, go! Baaaaaaaaa! Go,go,go,go!)

I forgot to play classical music at lunch but I did chase the kids around with leftover crab legs. See, one set of legs  looked like a monster hand with a thumb. I kept waving it at them, like it was my hand, and hissing “CRAB LEGS! WATCH OUT!” I considered saving the legs for bedtime,when the sight of them creeping over the edge of Byron’s bunk-bed would result in hilarious consequences,  but that might ruin my chances of winning mom of the year, which I easily cinched up after day one of homeschooling.

Dinner was grilled, but it was my evening dance moves that were sizzlin’. Tony and Byron worked on Latin in the schoolroom while I ran in, sang some MC Hammer hits and did an awesome running man. When Tony implied I was “distracting” Byron I ran out singing, “You can’t touch this!”

Yes, things were back to normal.  Flush from my sustained exertions, I decided to celebrate with a hot fudge sundae. Bring it on day three!


  1. To reduce the mess with the sensory rice bin, I used to place the empty baby pool in the living room and put my little brother and his rice bin inside it. That way he could scoop and go crazy with the rice without making a mess of everything. The rice fell into the baby pool and when he was finished, I just poured it back in the bin. I also made sure he was stripped to his diaper, so he wouldn’t end up sowing the rice through the house …

  2. Probably your dance routine at the end isn’t supposed to be the focus of this post, but….it’s all I can think about! My kids can’t STAND it when I do my super awesome dance moves for their edification, particularly whilst they’re trying to complain about something. What’s wrong with them?

    1. Once I’m dead and gone I know my kids will fondly look back with awe and admiration on all the times I shook my groove thing while ignoring their meal complaints or pleas for school help. And isn’t that what motherhood is all about? Creating memories amidst a nurturing environment?
      Or maybe our kids can join up and form some sort of support group for “mortified kids of dancing mothers”.

  3. Just clicked over from Building Cathedrals and love your blog! Just starting homeschooling first grade (after quasi-hs kindergarten last year) and I’m glad to know someone else has tears, too. Also, we have a three-year-old Edith–yours is the only other one I’ve run into that’s under the age of 75 🙂 I’ll definitely be back 🙂

    1. Thank you! For some reason, I always love meeting other families whose children have the same names as my children, even though I always make sure to give my kids names that no one else I know has. Go figure. We call our Edith, Edie for short and she actually hates her name as does my daughter Adeline, who we call Addie. Maybe that is why they give me such a hard time during school.
      Good luck homeschooling this year!

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