Exposing Pre-Phase Three Syndrome
Ladies, if you and your spouse are practicing NFP and attempting to space your children due to the gravest of circumstances, your husband may be suffering with PPT, or Pre-Phase Three syndrome!
In the days leading up to phase three, you may notice the following in your husband;
- An increasing interest in the date.
- An increased need for snuggling, hugging and lingering kisses, while asking what the date is.
- Spends his evenings trying to distract himself with TV, video games, etc. more than usual.
- Irritability
- Can not be near you without sweating profusely.
- A crazed look in his eye.
- A sudden splurge on children’s movies, games and other items to occupy the children for an extended period of time.
Many men have other symptoms they may keep to themselves out of fear and embarrassment. But no more! It is time to shed light on this very real medical condition and give it the attention it deserves. And just like premenstrual syndrome (PMS), modern science has produced a revolutionary cure to help men cope with PPT. Women have Midol, and now, thank’s to the quack labs here at ‘This Ain’t The Lyceum” men now have ‘Libi-Dull’.
While we do not suggest slipping Libi-Dull unknowingly into your husband’s coffee in the morning, we can assure you the capsules are odorless, tasteless and leave no unpleasant residue in the mouth. When taken daily, Libi-Dull is guaranteed to alleviate all the symptoms listed above and restore a sense of joy and vitality to men of all ages. Four out of five OB/GYNs also recommend Libi-Dull for those six weeks postpartum as well.
So ladies, stop the Jekyll and Hyde and help your husband reclaim the remainder of his month. We’re so convinced of your satisfaction with Libi-Dull that we’re offering nine days free! Use the contact form at the top of the page to request your sample today!
I die.
This is great, Kelly. You’re so clever.
Oh my gosh, so it’s not just my husband? Good to know!
And “six weeks postpartum”…do other moms really wait that long? Just asking for a friend 😉
hilarious; my husband and I successfully used NFP for a year when several of our children needed several surgeries and my hair was turning grey RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES. During that time, my husband experienced PPT, and I remember thinking what a blessing the abstinence was because it made us crave intimacy all the more. At first, I really resented not being able to use contraception (I’m a convert so the concept was new to me). However, during the year we used NFP for serious (not grave) reasons, I felt so blessed to suddenly be the object of my husband’s desire again after 13 years of marriage. I know women who are on the pill & whose husband’s are addicted to porn & they’re “abstaining” b/c the pill has taken away the woman’s drive and the porn leaves the man preferring masturbation. In short, I’ve come a long way on my journey in regard to NFP and I’m thankful to laugh about it with you. God bless you for your humor. We all need it.
HA! It’s a real condition, but it doesn’t only affect men. 😉
All. So. Freakin’. TRUE. and ditto, Micaela. Ditto!
LOVE LOVE LOVE…
I am a neophyte and all gratitude is due to NFP and a my Incredibly handsome and theological husband.
And err yes, we both get the same symtoms…
My conversion story.
http://nickyrothmann.blogspot.com/2013/05/conversion-how-it-all-began.html
Love and Light
Too funny! How did I miss this earlier?