#SOTG I Win

I’m so excited to reveal my bevy of Something Other Than God contest entries. I know I could’ve just emailed them all to Jen and crossed my fingers, but what’s the fun in that? I’m a firm believer in the power of social media, and since some of these entries are based on merit, feel free to share them over the internets and let Jen know which one should earn me a giftcard. Mama needs to order some more latex free exam gloves!

First my review on a retail website.

This book described Jen’s lifelong search to answer the questions around the gaping black hole that formed in her soul at a young age. Like a big tasty donut, she found distraction, but not contentment with life wide variety of toppings; the sprinkles of career success, the sweet pink icing of material gains, the toasted coconut flakes of smug self-righteousness at witnessing the flaws of modern Christianity in its myriad of forms. Until finally, she discovered the fluffy white creme de la creme of the Catholic church and realized it was not the gross custard flavor she imagined. Her donut was complete and it is for us to enjoy the tasty, tasty recipe with a side of coffee.

Screen Shot 2014-05-12 at 6.31.39 AM
Proof!

Next, THE EPIC SELFIE CATEGORY. I only have three entries.

1. Velociraptors; are they trying to find me, or #SOTG???velociraptors in the kitchen

2. DEVO, Whip It! When a problem comes along you must whip it! When the cream sets out to long, say forget it and go read #SOTG. CRACK open THAT book!

Devo

3. The Most Interesting Blogger in the world. Stay thirsty….for knowledge my friends.

Most intersting blogger

Finally, I created a Something Other Than God cocktail. As I have NO experience making drinks, this was a toughy, but by pulling inspiration from the pages and my dusty supply of liquor bottles, I think I created a unique and tasty beverage. Check out the tutorial.

For the record that’s:
1 glug, fine red wine
1 shot of Tequila
1 glug from a 40 oz bottle of malt liquor
A generous squirt of hot sauce
1+ shots of Mama Walkers Bacon Liqueur

You can’t even imagine the flavor! Look, here I am sharing it with the deck!

photo (1)

I would advise serving my #SOTG cocktail to anyone who doesn’t love the book or who wants to engage in tiresome arguments about “problems” within the Catholic Church. “Oh, do you disagree with Jen’s conclusions and believe in an all lesbian clergy centered around an Earth goddess? Let me mix you a drink while we calmly discuss that.” I like to say that the burning in your mouth represents eternal hellfire.

So readers, I hope you’ve enjoyed viewing these entries. I encourage all forms of gentle encouragement / communication (I didn’t officially say spamming, but wink, wink) with our dear author to let her know these epic selfies demand recognition. And if you haven’t yet entered your own pics and reviews, you have until Friday….but faced with this competition, I don’t know why you’d bother.

29 Comments

  1. A shocked Helen exclaimed: Did Mrs. M REALLY DRINK THAT??? In her MOUTH?????
    She is very impressed by you. I, on the other hand, am a little bit afraid to visit your kitchen any time soon.

  2. Dear Kelly,

    I found your blog because of this hilarious video from conversion diary. I appreciate your wit, but I just wanted you to know that I was hurt by your joke about lesbian clergy worshipping the goddess. I am a woman who also happens to be a lesbian and a theology student. Although I know we might have some disagreements (and I respect your conviction), I was hurt by that comment and needed to tell you. Sometimes because we assume people won’t be in our readership or we don’t know them personally, we get a laugh at their expense. But God led me to your blog. Please reconsider the jokes you make and the spirit they convey.

    Thank you,
    Rachel

  3. It’s not often that I grimace and have a puke-flavored college flashback when I read blogs – but that cocktail recipe did it for me.

  4. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww yea. THAT’s what I’m talkin’ about. Wanna see that last selfie on Jen’s t-shirt, stat!!!! Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaantastic!!!!!!

  5. Dude! Velociraptors, I mean, Say WHAAAAAT!? You do win the internet. And I want that t-shirt too! You got some, erm, guts taking a swig of that drink, super impressed. Pretty excited for my video…. cheers!

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