{SQT} I’m Not As Bitter As I Sound…Bah Humbug

Having just completed all the laundry from our trip out of town over Thanksgiving, I can finally sit down and blog without getting dagger eyes from the mountain of clothes in my living room. However, I’m considering instituting a few days of nudity next week so we can all stop producing so much dirty laundry. I’m thinking “Adam and Eve Before the Fall Monday”, “Amazon Tribe Tuesday” and “Nude Beach Wednesday” or something. The only downside will be the cost to keep our home warm enough for me since the kids never dress appropriately for the weather anyway.

1. I know I’ve told you about the Ugly Sweater Run I’m participating in tomorrow. It’s the fourth of my seven runs to raise  money and awareness for families raising a child or children with Spinal Muscular Atrophy. Have you donated yet? Why the hell not? I’m tired of being polite. Click over to PayPal and give me something Scrooge McScroogey pants.

I’ve even designed this insert you can place in your Christmas cards to drum up more solicitations. ( And if you ever need any help with your own fundraisers for Catholic schools, scout troops and the like, I’m available for consultation and design.)

2. I was very naive in thinking my 35K4SMA campaign would be interesting to local media. “Surely, they’d love to do a feature on a mother of five running seven 5Ks!” I thought as I sent off my press releases. But so far, it’s been zilch. I even tried harassing local media personalities on Facebook and Twitter (after a couple of drinks) to no avail. Meanwhile, one of today’s top stories on Yahoo! is what Beyonce and Jay-Z’s daughter is wearing.  And my local South Jersey paper shares an article on an upcoming Santa run that features scantily clad women. Because I’m not pop royalty or willing to flash my goods, I need grassroots support. So if you can tweet, share, post or email your friends and family about 35K4SMA, I’ll be able to stop writing sour quick takes about it. (For good examples see Maia, Bonnie and Jenna.)

3. Okay, *deep cleansing breathe out* moving on. My oldest son had a sleepover with two good friends earlier this week, and while I’m no fan of hosting sleepovers, I will take a boys sleep over over a girls sleep over any day (or night). Highlights are as follows:

• I didn’t need to clean or decorate.
• There’s no squealing.
• The don’t require crafts.
• Boys pack less and therefore there’s less chance of something being left behind.
• There were fine with the fact that I didn’t have time to make a cake so I offered them treats we had around the house. Byron pretended to blow out a candle while they munched on Klondike bars.
• And most importantly, there’s no squealing.

The only thing that kept me on my toes was Byron’s one friend kept asking me for food and then casually throwing in, “I have my EpiPen with me just in case.” Wait, what?!? Thankfully, there were no incidents. I also keep a bottle of expired Benadryl on hand so, all parents can feel safe leaving their child(ren) in my care.

4. National Novel Writing Month is over and I only completed a little over 8,000 words (which, if you’re not a writer, I know that sounds like a lot but it’s absolutely nothing. Thankfully, at least my kids are impressed.) The whole experience taught me that I really enjoy (need) instant gratification in regards to my writing. I love typing up a blog post, hitting publish and then reading the comments and watching the ‘Likes’ and ‘Shares’ appear on Facebook. A book requires you to just keep slogging away for weeks, or months, with all positive feedback  a distant carrot. Often, I gave up working on my book because there was something I “needed” to blog about. The allure of a completed manuscript or book deal just wasn’t enough to keep me on task. So will I keep working on my fiction story? I don’t know. Perhaps I need a new idea that will excite me more, and pull me from my blogging. Maybe I will get to work on that NFP title and ride on the coat tails of Simcha’s success.

5. We attempted family pictures again this Thanksgiving with ‘meh’ results. This is my favorite of the bunch, but I use the term “favorite” very loosely. The older kids all picked their own outfits, and were very proud of themselves for selecting similar colors but goodness, pattern overload! I tried to keep the rest of us in solids, but then Fulton went and messed his shirt before photos and Tony quick threw him in a Star Wars t-shirt. I also had to crop Tony’s feet out since he wasn’t wearing shoes. I guess if I’m not willing to pay a professional, I shouldn’t get to upset at less than professional results.

But I think I enjoy this family photo better, even though the kids designed me to look like an angry librarian. Oh, and we don’t have a dog. The Lego dog represents the dog we had up until four years ago; maybe it’s taxidermy?

6. I’m giving away a book that is perfect for any and everyone on your list. Check it out. I wouldn’t lie to you on St. Nicholas Day.

7. After many delays, Teddy finally gets his wheelchair today. While we’re all excited, I’m not looking forward to the sun up ’til sun down demolition derby that is sure to follow. But what else would you expect when you give  three and five year old boys 200+ pounds of metal that can travel up to 5 mph and move furniture? I’m stock piling spackle in the mean time. Check back later and I’ll update with a picture.

UPDATED!

He’s surprisingly good, however he did decide to run full speed into the edge of a few doorways. He also quickly discovered how to up his speed. Fulton follows behind him giving pointers, or ramming Teddy’s rear wheels if he stops suddenly. I almost had a heart attack getting the two of them home. 

Until then, be sure to swing back to Jen’s for more takes worth reading quickly. I’ve got a lot of chocolate coins I need to help the kids eat.