The Clock

1. Cue angelic choir,

part the heavens,

enter in the streams of golden sunlight,

BEHOLD THEE TIMEPIECE OF YE GODS;

Your eyes do not deceive you. It’s a German beer stein, pipe, accordion, Tudor house wall clock. AND as a bonus it has Roman numerals, which we love cause we’re traditional. This is the only acceptable step up from a sundial or hourglass around here.

2. 

This is a dramatic reenactment of the moment at Goodwill when I first laid eyes on the clock. “It has turquoise and red in it, just like the new kitchen! It has a beer stein, pipe and accordion!”

Instantly, my mind was transported back to our crazy night at the Germanfest and I envisioned that this timepiece would turn our new kitchen into this;

I couldn’t believe that someone had willingly donated this clock, with a working battery, to Goodwill. And, just as astonishing was the fact that this item was still on the shelf when I arrived, having been passed over by who knows how many other shoppers.

3.

How do I love thee clock, let me count the ways. I, II, III, IV…

The clock came home with me for $6! Which I had in cash because a few days earlier the kids had thought wrapping all the coins in the coin jar would be fun. I purchased this clock for pennies! Rolls and rolls and rolls of pennies!

4. Tony said I used the biggest screw I could find to hang it up like that was a bad thing. I can’t take a chance that a freak earthquake, tsunami or fat person tripping and falling on my floor would shake it off the wall.

5.

I wanted the cat and the chickens to know I still loved them and that they didn’t need to feel threatened by the presence of the new clock. Whiskas is warming up to the idea of a new clock in the house but the chickens, especially the head rooster, is having trouble adjusting to another alpha male. Yes, I’m pretty sure the clock is a male and I can’t decide whether to name him Otto Von Bismarking Time or Albert Timestein.

6. The clock met with mixed results from the children.

Teddy thinks the clock looks delicious. Mmmm, bratwursts. Or as he would say, “AAAAAA! Pllfpf!”

Obviously Fulton thinks the clock is on par with monster trucks.

Edie holding the clock out the bathroom window. It’s a long story but she likes the clock.

Addie, Byron and Tony are all also in love with the clock but I was unable to capture that sentiment on film despite allowing them plenty of time to caress and hold the clock under my hawklike glances and warm, encouraging prompts. I documented confusion, grimaces and forced smiles but not the true feeling of admiration they surely have tucked deep down in a wee corner of their hearts.

7. It’s fair to say, no matter what numbers the big and little hands are resting on, it’s always half past awesome up in here.

Now that I’ve blown your mind, head over to Jen at Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes. 

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