Happy Easter readers!
It was not my intent to take a week off writing. Certainly, I knew celebrating Easter with out-of-town family would delay posting, however, I didn’t expect to spend time at the hospital with Fulton, and as such I’ve been preoccupied. Thankfully, he’s doing well, but you’ll have to tolerate seven takes all about him and the joys of hospital stays. (And if you skip to the bottom to link up without tolerating my takes then you’re heartless.)
1. So much of hospital visits is sitting around and waiting, followed by flurries of everyone needing to do everything at the same, freaking, time. The ER was crowded so we waited to be seen, and consequently, the pulmonary floor was crowded so we waited for a room. Everything is done on a schedule; doctor rounds in the a.m., breathing treatments every four hours, supplemental water and formula in between. And it always seems like a new doctor, nurse, therapist or student needs to stop in to chat at those exact times. The remainder of the time we sit and time passes: life goes on as usual outside these walls, but inside Fulton’s room it’s like limbo. (And I hash out a blog post.)
2. Specifically, Fulton has a chest cold, the same everyone in our family had. On Monday, after I was convinced he was doing so much better, his fever spiked, his oxygen levels dropped and his heart rate went up, plus he looked exhausted. You could tell his body was wiped out from fighting this bug. We did everything we could do at home, but the big fear was pneumonia which we would need a chest x-ray to rule out. We brought him to Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP) to get him checked out and while he does not have pneumonia, they’ve been able to do a bit more for him here which will hopefully speed up his recovery.
3. Fulton hasn’t been hospitalized due to respiratory distress in years. Given that he has SMA, most of the doctors and nurses were amazed, and assumed he’d been hospitalized elsewhere since his 2011 admission here. I don’t know what I can credit his healthiness to, except maybe THIS GUY! BOOYAH!
4. This post will go live at midnight, and chances are my husband will be here at the hospital trying to sleep on the sofa “bed” they provide. When Fulton was hospitalized for this g-tube surgery, he shared a room and instead of a bed, I got to use a fold out chair “bed” which was like a big, hard, plastic LaZboy. Yes, sleeping in a hospital bed is hard enough for patients, but the guest accommodations are often their own type of hell. It’s a great way to pretend to be a Cistercian. (The hospital does serve good coffee, praise the Lord.)
5. The one thing (on top of outstanding medical care) that CHOP has going for it is it’s cafeteria (thought the Johns Hopkins cafeteria/food court doesn’t disappoint either [good grief, the things I’m an expect in now…]). FRESH SUSHI! MTO OMELETTES! Other yummy food that doesn’t remind you of a Chris Farley / Adam Sandler SNL skit! I’ve already forgotten how poorly I slept!
6. I can write about sushi and hospital sofa “beds” because Fulton is doing really well. Hopefully, today/Friday he will come home. I know there are other special needs moms out there who are fearing for their childs’ lives right this minute. Many are here at CHOP with me. If you can spare a prayer for Fulton, please also remember the other children in this hospital who will not being going home today, and their parents as well. (UPDATE: Looks like a Saturday discharge is more likely.)
7. Lastly, love hurts, and not in just the “he dumped me and I’m going to cry about it for a week” type of way. So often, I see love depicted as only gushy romantic or sexual love. It seems perfectly acceptable in modern society, and it is often glamorized, to do something foolish for love, but rarely ever is the hard work of loving mentioned. Even in many churches, love is depicted by Jesus holding the children on his lap or carrying a lamb (or maybe this guy.) But love is late nights, worry, panic and exhaustion. It’s feeling crushed and defeated when all you’ve given isn’t enough. Love is sacrifice. True love can’t be selfish. It’s giving no less than everything, just as Christ did for us on the cross.
Sitting beside is one reward of completely loving my child. When we are able to view our trials as the result of love, and therefore inherently good, rather than senseless suffering, we’ve moved closer to what Christ suffered greatly, both physically and mentally, as he bore the sins of mankind on the cross. He did that for love of me, so I’m pretty sure I can handle that hospital sofa “bed” for love of Fulton, though admittedly enduring trials patiently is a constant struggle due to our sinful nature. Suffering under the weight of love, when done right gives us hope and makes us stronger. I think love is why I can continually bear up under the weight of SMA and not be crushed by it.
Okay, enough from me. Link up your takes below and remember to link back to this post so your readers can find all the Quick Takes. I look forward to copious amounts of Easter pictures! Please don’t disappoint me!