Written by on 10/21/2012

The Musical Truck I Want To Meet

Humor

I see Dorian is living it up in France; eating crepes and sipping mulled wine right out in the open. Since I just went to confession, I’m not going to write about how jealous I am, because I’m totally not. Hey, I have a really great package of gluten-free pancake mix and a bottle of Cupcake wine if I want to start living all high-brow. Who needs Paris? DO YOU HEAR ME DORIAN??? I DON’T NEED FRANCE!!!

Now that we’ve cleared that up; I was inspired however to write about a great business idea I had a while back not related to quiche. The alcohol truck.

Behold:

Every summer, the tinkle, tinkle of the ice cream truck sends children screaming into the street, much to the horror of their parents and oncoming traffic. It’s like Pavlov’s dogs. By August, they hear the truck when it’s still in another county and immediately start salivating.

Wouldn’t it be nice to get that same childhood rush again? To hear maybe, Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville, and know the alcohol truck was turning onto your street? After a long day at the office or cooped up at home, wouldn’t you tear out your front door to meet Mr. Boozy and his colorful truck of adult treats? And the best thing is, it doesn’t have to end with summer. Imagine Mr. Boozy slowly canvasing your block with warm cider, hot toddys and hot chocolate topped off with Whipahol once the snow starts flying. Who’s salivating now?

Unfortunately, it seems most localities frown upon roaming bands of middle-aged parents consuming alcohol in open containers outdoors. Like hordes of sugared up kids isn’t a public nuisance. If someone knows a magical place, that’s not France, where I could make this dream a reality, please let me know. Thank you.

 

11 comments

  • Dwija Borobia (@HouseUnseen) has written:

    I am seriously in awe that you just wrote a post about wanting a liquor truck. THIS IS WHY YOU ARE GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

    • kmantoan has written:

      I never thought of Mr. Boozy as being the key to world domination, but now that you mention it….

  • Rebekka has written:

    I can see only one problem with this, and that is that I would feel like I needed to get out of my pajamas before running down the street after the Mr Boozy truck.

  • Kyra has written:

    I seem to remember a Daily Show segment about something similar in New Orleans. A drive-through margarita shop, that was it. And Stephen Colbert going through it over and over.

    The truck would be even better.

  • TonyMantoan has written:

    “Unfortunately, it seems most localities frown upon roaming bands of middle-aged parents consuming alcohol in open containers outdoors.”

    That’s rank puritanism right there.

  • Debbie Leal has written:

    This is a fabulous idea. It might even create world peace we’ve all been hoping for.

  • Sarah has written:

    I volunteer my driveway. ASAP.

  • Lindsay has written:

    I just read this word for word out loud to my husband. We both approve this message.

  • kmantoan has written:

    But how do we make the dream a reality???? Bribing law enforcement with wine slushies? I’m at a loss as to how to move forward.

  • AssortedJoys has written:

    Ummm… I want one too. Perhaps he should go right in front of the ice cream truck? If I had a margarita I would be much more likely to allow the children an ice cream cone and much more able to handle the sugar rush/crash afterward.

  • ourlittlenthouse has written:

    *Gasp* This. Would. Be. Awesome.

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